New “retro” jersey (above): Forged in hell by Satan himself. Hitler and Stalin did the stitching. It will steal your daughter’s virginity and never call her again.

Green with yellow numbers? How boring and plain. And how dare it have a logo of our mascot that I’ve never seen before? I hope it dies a painful death.

2009 “retro” jersey (below): Created by Jesus in his Laboratory of Beauty. It’s made of a 50/50 blend of rainbows and a mother’s love.

Green with yellow numbers? How simple, yet divine. Can you marry a jersey? Because I’m in love.

 

Countdown to kickoff: 101 things I love about the Oregon Ducks

On September 3, the Oregon Ducks will begin their 2011 football season. To get through the dog days of summer, I’m listing 101 cool, random things I love about the Ducks, one per day until kickoff in Dallas. In no particular order.

#19: Oregon schools the Zona Zoo.

The first video features the brainiacs at Arizona coming out of the stands a bit early against Oregon in 2009.

This video shows Jeremiah Masoli and Ed Dickson serving them a nice big mug of shut the hell up.

Countdown to kickoff: 101 things I love about the Oregon Ducks

On September 3, the Oregon Ducks will begin their 2011 football season. To get through the dog days of summer, I’m listing 101 cool, random things I love about the Ducks, one per day until kickoff in Dallas. In no particular order.

#24: Nate Costa’s hands.

Nate Costa might go down as one of the most popular players in Oregon history, which seems crazy since he rarely played. Multiple knee injuries kept him on the sideline for lengthy periods, and when he was healthy, guys like Jeremiah Masoli and Darron Thomas relegated him to backup duty.

But he’s a major part of Oregon lore just for the great hold he made on an extra point in Tucson in November, 2009.

The Ducks had driven the length of the field in the closing seconds to close to within one. They just needed an ordinary extra point to force overtime.

The snap hit the turf before it got to Costa, but he managed to save it. The Ducks won in overtime, and continued their drive to Pasadena.

All thanks to Nate Costa’s hands.

(Play starts at 8:50)

Countdown to kickoff: 101 things I love about the Oregon Ducks

On September 3, the Oregon Ducks will begin their 2011 football season. To get through the next 3+ months, I’m listing 101 cool, random things I love about the Ducks, one per day until kickoff in Dallas. In no particular order.

#80: The Ed Dickson scream.

What’s the proper celebration after catching a game-tying touchdown on the road, with six seconds left in the game, in an endzone ringed by enemy students waiting to rush the field?

Stand up and scream with joy.